i'm on maternity leave. so in honor of not being a teacher for next three months, i have decided to forgo capitalization. mmmkkay? :)
normally when i sit down to write, i have a plan...a general idea of what i want to write about-- a theme, an issue, a worry, anyway. today i don't have a plan. instead, i'd like to just let you enjoy the random ramblings and thoughts of my very pregnant brain.
i.....laura elizabeth gambrel....am a control freak. let's be honest, i like to control a lot of things. i like to control my day, my students, my appearance, my weight, my schedule, scott (shh..don't tell him) , my free time, and various other things. on the last day of my pregnancy, i've realized that there is ABSOLULTELY nothing you can control with pregnancy. NOTHING! i think that might be part of the reason why, at times, it has been hard for me. i'm not going to be able to control everything ( like i wish i could) when lilly is here either. it's been a long nine months of the Lord telling me, "laura, give up your white knuckled grip on your life! you're not in control anyway, I AM!" you'd think that i woulda realized this before now. but i am a control freak AND i am stubborn. :) so the past few days has been filled with a lot of prayer. the Lord has blessed scott and I immensely. it's time that i really, honestly, and truly just GIVE IT UP. So here we are...day one. i'm along for the ride, Lord....let me know when we're there.
i love carrie underwood. i heard that her new single is about tony romo. it makes sense!! COWBOY casanova?! speaking of my friend carrie, yesterday i was singing to my iPod while attempting to clean and not fall over. a struggle. i love carrie's songs because she rocks, but i also love her because her range is perfect for me. not to high...not to low. i feel like i can 'kinda' keep up with her. anyway.....singing very pregnant is hard! i could sing maybe 3-4 words and i would get so out of breath! lilly was probably thinking "mom, give it up! you're going to give yourself an asthma attack and all this breathing is shaking me all around! i'm not going to flip, give.it.up!" I just couldn't though. i was all inspired and super excited for her new album. (november 2nd in case you were wondering). when carrie gets a grip on you, you just havta sing. holly knows what i'm talkin bout! :)
confession: i haven't cooked a true meal in over two months. tonight i am going to. i'm going to make my amazing husband a meal that will knock his socks off. the last night of "just the two of us" shouldn't include our regular dinner of pb and j (scott)and tostinos pizzas (laura) . i'm pullin out the big guns (and my dusty pots and pans) tonight. hopefully i don't set the house on fire!
pray for me tomorrow morning! i'm still scared to death about the c-section. pray also that scott doesn't have a date with the tile floor in the OR. i need him! more than he'll ever know...
this time tomorrow, i'll be carrying my daughter on the OUTSIDE. holy crap. sitting here feeling her kicks and nudges makes me a little sad. i'm gonna miss this. a new chapter is beginning, my pregnancy is ending (hallelujah), and i'm not in control.
love-love
told ya i was going to ramble ;)
Good luck tomorrow!!! Everything will be great. I'll be praying for you to have an overwhelming amount of peace and no nerves!! You are about to experience the most amazing thing ever!!!
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