Tuesday, May 27, 2014

M A R R I A G E when mom and dad clock out for the day

Each day is spent giving pieces of myself away. I give a piece of myself to my children, a hunk to my job, a slice to daily duties, more sections away to family and friends, a piece I give away to myself through running, and at the end of the days what's left often goes into checking social media sites under the umbrella of "unwinding" at the end of the day. Come 9 PM, and there isn't much of Laura left. I'm spent and there is nothing left to give.

Work. Commute. Pick Up. Dinner. Baths. Chasing. Cuddling. Reading. Pajama Wrangling. Bed. Back into bed. Back into bed. Back into bed. We both collapse on the couch--- click on the TV---and sink into our own worlds of our phones and mindless programming.

We're exhausted. We love each other---but we're exhausted.  We communicate about our day and make sure to fill in important details---but connecting? Truly allowing each other into each others lives that aren't veneered---it doesn't happen as much as it should.

The other day we both plopped down in our usual spots post bedtime and sat there without talking for twenty minutes. I was on my phone liking all your beautiful photos on Instagram and pinning my next week's dinner menu. He was checking scores of every. single. sporting. event. possible. We both looked at each other and started laughing. It was ridiculous. We hadn't had a single moment of our Thursday that we had been alone. We were mom and dad---and now we were Scott and Laura and we had nothing to say.

Don't you love the first 10 minutes of date night?! Oh I surely do. Those moments where you've kissed the kids, practically ran to the car, rolled the windows down, and sped off----to 3-4 hours of JUST US. We grab hands and look at each other as if to say. Hi, Friend......its our time. It's just us......we can just be......and a deep exhale and inhale fills this momma up to the brim with contentment, happiness, and love for the one whom I married.

Reconnecting on nights that aren't date nights? Takes more work. A half an hour after kids have been snuggled in their beds has been scheduled to be our at home date night. No phones. No TV.

We have to save a slice of ourselves for each other. We have to make communication a priority. He's my favorite person on this planet. He's mine. One day we won't have preschoolers hanging from our limbs. They'll grow up----and don't we all want more than anything else to experience the feeling of date night---every night?

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