Thursday, June 2, 2011

I know what you do in HELL.

 My fam and I are bebopping to the Outer Banks in a week. WOMP! Beach trips require bathing suits. BOO!

outer banks ya'll.

i hate bathing suit shopping.



with reckless abandon.

I hated it when I was a size four and I still hate it now that I'm much {much much} more than a four.  I spent 3 hours the other day looking for one...IT WAS PURE HELL. I'm feeling ranty. Here we go.

Laura's Ranty Reasons Why Shopping  for a Bathing Suit SUUUuuuucks

1. It reminds me that I wasn't "too chubby" to wear a cute bikini in high school.

2.  Swimsuit hangers are a joke. You can't pull  just one hanger off the rack. The straps are indefinitely stuck and restrung on 4 other hangers forcing you to bring all of them to the dressing room orrr stand there wasting  time untangling them orrrrr just let the cluster fall to the floor and quickly kick it to the middle of the display and start over.

3.  Hygiene liners really are disgusting. bluah.

4.  Department store mirrors. nuff said.

5. When I get frustrated I sweat. Sweating and Lycra equals rubber and rubbing which equals pain and sausage feelings.

6. "Polka dots, gigantic hibiscus flowers, deep cutout in the boobage, frilly skirt, all on one suit? I don't work for Glamor, but No no no nononononononononono....

7. The miracle suit---a joke--ten pounds lighter? psha!!

8.  Tags on suits turn into RAZOR BLADES when trying on.

9. $145....really? for lesssss than a yard of stretchy fabric?  and I WON'T Look like the model wearing it? 

My marathon was an epic fail. I came home  and shopped for another  hour online. I found one. My size.  A cute color other than black. RUCHING, pleats, and ruffles . :) :) :) Thanks again, J. Crew.  You brought me down off the "My life is over! Wah! Woe" ledge once again.

"You don't get to hate your body when you see what it can do." -Sara

What a very true statement made in conversation with a friend of mine earlier this week. When relishing in the Bathing Suit Debacle Woe is Me Mood that I have about shopping for B Suits it got me thinking. I don't hate my body. It's great. With help from the the good Lord it made LIFE--It's not perfect--but I need to RESPECT it. It protects, creates, loves, laughs, and generally does what I tell it to. ;) I believe the body of a Woman is really powerful and beautiful--flaws and all.

But. BUT!!  I do get to hate bathing suit shopping......because it's really annoying.  I"ll forget about the painstaking process once I'm beach-side with my faves. What's annoying eventually turns into a laughable memory andI make a lot of em. :)

Have you entered the Linkel Designs giveaway yet? It ends tomorrow !!


  1. AMEN SISTER! I to HATE bathing suit shopping. It's up there with getting a pap smere and flying! BOO!

  2. I looooove that suit, have a great time on vacation!!

  3. HAHAHA! Everthing about this post craked me up...especially the title, because I was totally unsure where you were going to go with that! :)YOu are sooo so so and sooooo right though. AMen to swimsuit shopping sucking!;)

  4. That is the prettiest bathing suit! Have fun!

  5. YOU are adorable and will look fab-oh in your new bathing suit! thank you for giving me this giggle. you put into words exactly what i have thought for years! well. . .since turning 30 that is!